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THE YCEO: The ‘Trotro’ Ride Back Home

The ‘Trotro’ Ride Back Home
The baby behind me is crying so loud, the woman beside me has a carrier bag and it smells like Banku and Grilled Tilapia making my throat beg for saliva but her sweaty body is making my white shirt very dirty; but no problem, my OMO and Sunlight from sundays washing still lie on my kitchen floor.
The lady on the next roll is shouting so much on her never ending phone conversation….
What language is she even speaking? And the driver’s music volume is high enough to cause ear drum damage. And why are they stopping at every busstop?
Sometimes I wish we can just fly to our destinations. In the middle of all these, I just couldn’t hold my laughter when a loud “I like your moving moving” ringtone woke me up from my small doozing off. Wooow, Chinese phones will kill us ooo. So loud tones yet you have to shout or scream to make a successful conversation.
She has joined the first lady in one of Ghana’s loudest and longest phone conversations ever.
Oh thank God, the pure water seller just passed by my window and I bought one “special ice” but it taste strange ooo. May be they are faking this to. The secret is always to go for the seat  by the windows for easy access to vendors when they pass and for fresh air of course. But now I have to pee. My usual urinal at Madina station charges 30p now ooo. You drink water for 20p and pee it out for 30p. Funny world.
But no matter what, I have to pee or find some corner in between those kiosk and stores at the Station near the “goat sellers” stands.
Its amaizing how those our brothers have been throwing one goat after the other from one pen to the other. And the smells from the He-goats, how do they manage it? Their wives and girlfriends will answer this. My biggest headache is now with what to eat for lunch. The woman with the Banku and Tilapia just alighted and now my mind is all filled with Banku and Tilapia…mtweeee.
I can’t afford this today so some kenkey and those small small fried Tilapia will do; may be some friend eggs. Every Tilapia is Tilapia.
This driver paaa, won’t he at least change the song? Walaii walaii walaiii, R2Bees self go bore. Thank God the next two stops is my busstop but as usual, there is traffic to the station. The few passengers on board are insulting the President left right and centre as if he created the traffic.
Political talk now. Everybody has something to say about the President   and his government. Its interesting the way we think in Ghana oooo. Gooosh, somebody spoil the air and everybody starts to frown. Even the driver had to stop the music and asked who did that.
Come see people opening windows already opened. Traffic dey happen serious. Hahahaha
Time to get off, get my kenkey and go home. May be I shouldn’t think of food after inhaling that bad air earlier.
Eiiii, see this mate ooo; he said I didn’t pay him ooo. He wants to embarass me ooo. I go sound one eye top give am ooo. Like dem go beat me kill me today for this station. LOL
The ride on a trotro is not only a journey but a different experience everyday. Until I get my own ride someday, the trotro will always be my friend and I will keep learning.
By Honour Agbemor-Flint. 

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